l IKEA river (feat. Elijah James)

In sweet dreams, I kid myself
在夢中我不斷欺騙自己
Have your love for good
永遠擁有著你對我的愛
I really had hoped you'd stay
我曾真的希望你能夠留下
But like the river, you just come and go
但如河流你總是來去匆忙
And these things, they comfort me
當我心緒於你的種種過往
When my mind's on you
他們都會盡力安撫我
And I feel you comfort me
此刻我彷佛感受到你的慰藉
But like the river, it just comes and goes
但如河流不過是來去匆忙
I used to think that you was Superman when I was younger (Yeah)
我兒時總會認為你就是超人
Findin' comfort in your voice when I was down and under
當我跌落谷底時便在你的聲音中尋求慰藉
Put you on a pedestal and now I kinda wonder if that made sense
把你當偶像崇拜如今卻想知道這是否有意義
'Cause I'm convinced you showed a lot of colors (Yeah)
因為我深信這不過你的虛偽的幌子
All them nights I was alone, I hid inside the covers
這些夜裡我一人孤單地躲在被子裡
Used to argue with my moms whenever I was stubborn (Facts)
我的固執讓我習慣與母親爭吵
I never warmed up to the idea of a step-dad because he wasn't you
我從未接受繼父的任何看法因為他始終無法成為你
And you and him ain't even like each other (Word )
他與你甚至毫無共性
Used to bring me 'round your girlfriends as I recall
我記得你經常把我帶到你的女朋友們那
I thought one or two was cool, but I ain't like 'em all
我認為一兩個很酷可我不能接受她們全部
'Cause all you ever did was argue 'bout who's right or wrong
你所做的不過是想爭辯誰對誰錯
And you ain't have no job
你沒有工作
So you would sit at home and light a bong (Yeah)
有時間整天坐在家裡吞雲吐霧
Used to crave for your attention, but I never got it
渴望你的關懷但我從未得到
And everything you said we'd do is just another promise
你總是對我不斷承諾卻又從未實現
You had dreams of bein' famous and I never doubted
你渴望一夜成名我也從未質疑
But I started rhymin' to impress you, if we bein' honest (Facts)
如果我們能坦誠相待那我便會以我的韻腳來打動你
But we can have some bondin' time and maybe pow-wow
但我們仍可以擁有親子時光又或是舉行一場聚會
A father/son relationship that we can smile 'bout
為我們父子的關係而露出微笑
At time's you got abusive and I had to bow down
在你罵我的時候我不得不低頭
Or keep on makin' music to try and compete with Bow Wow
埋頭製作音樂試圖超越BowWow
Your father died when you was young, I think that made a scar
你的父親在你年幼便離開了你在你的心裡留下了傷疤
I started thinkin ' maybe that's why you the way you are (Nah)
我想這就是你成為現在樣子的原因
End of the day, no excuse for how you played your part
直至最後你依然不能為你所曾扮過的角色辯解
Told myself when I became a father, I'ma raise the bar (Word)
我告訴我自己當我成為一名父親時我會提高標準
We had a lot of fallin' outs and didn't talk for years
我們過去爭吵不斷並且好久沒有過交流
And all them birthdays and holidays got awfully weird
所有的生日與假期也隨之變得奇怪
You throw me in a foster home and I was brought to tears
你把我留在了收養家庭給我帶來的只有淚水
Livin' with some strangers, feelin' anxious, I was lost and scared (Yeah)
與陌生人生活深感焦慮恐懼使我逐漸迷失
And now I'm starin' at the river tryna get across
如今我看著河流嘗試渡河
And all I see is apparitions of what never was
我所看見的只有從未所見的幻象
And everything I used to wish for is dead and lost
我曾希望的一切事物都已消逝
And if I never see your ass again, I'll be better off
我想如果我從未遇見你我會過得更好
I'll be better off (Yeah)
過得更好
You are so negative (Uh)
你是如此消極
And you say you know
你說你心知肚明
But you know a goddamn thing
但你永不能忘卻這件事
Like the river, you just run and go
就像河流總是來去匆忙
You say you could do good
你說你可以做的更好
And better you know
你最好明白
But you tried no goddamn thing
你從未試過改善任何事情
Like the river, I'ma run from you
如同河流我已從你身旁游離
I told myself I wouldn't write a song, but f*ck it, I did
我曾告訴自己不會去寫下這首歌但我還是寫了
Oftentimes, I sit and wonder if it's somethin' I did
時常我坐下懷疑我是否經歷過這些事
Or maybe I was immature, but is it somethin' I said?
或僅是我還不夠成熟但這像是我說出來的話嗎
I can't help but feel the feelin' that there's somethin' I missed
我始終不禁想起我曾想念的某些事
I told you somethin' happened to me and you ain't protect me (Yeah)
我告訴了你我所遭受的痛苦可你卻沒能保護我
You tried to say you ain't believe me as you disrespect me (Facts)
你試圖解釋因為你不夠相信我但事實你根本沒把我當回事
And plus, you never had my back, in fact, you may resent me in a way
你沒有支持過我反而常常打擊惹怒我
'Cause everythin' I say, you try to use against me (Word)
我所說的一切盡數都會被你反對
And I never knew your other kids, but I knew of 'em (True)
我不認識你的其他孩子但我可以理解他們
I 'm not really sure if I like 'em, but I do love 'em (Do)
我不能肯定我是否喜歡他們但我可以去試著愛他們
Sh*t, I don't even think you knew but just a few of 'em
而你甚至都不一定記得住他們
'Cause all your baby mothers stayed away to keep you from 'em (Word)
因為所有你孩子們的母親都試圖讓你遠離他們
You probably out fillin' they heads with sh*t that's not the truth
你也許想要讓他們知道這一切不是真相
You probably told 'em that I switched up when I got some loot (Uh)
你也許想告訴他們如今我的功成名就
You probably told 'em that I'm greedy and I'm not so cool
你也許想告訴他們我的貪婪無知
That I worship the devil and I sold my soul to cop a pool (Yeah)
說我信奉魔鬼出賣靈魂來換取金錢
I worked my ass off to get rich, let's not confuse
千萬不要混淆實際上我奮力工作致富
I sacrificed my whole twenties just so I can move (True)
我犧牲了我二十歲的時光只為能讓我搬出去住
While everybody else was chillin', hangin' out with crews
當大家都在放鬆摸魚閒逛
I was writin' a plan to finally win while tryin' not to lose (True)
我早已寫下完美實現成功的計劃
I still remember signin' my deal and you got hella funny
我仍然記得我簽下合同那天你笑個不停
And at that time, you probably figured I had hella money (Yeah)
當時你可能認為我已經家財萬貫
But I only got a small advance
但我只拿到了一小筆預付金
So I ain't even get a chance to hold you down
故而我甚至沒有機會讓你失望
'Cause then you started gettin' jealous of me
令人高興的是如今我已身價百萬
But I'm worth a couple million now, I turned out fine (Yeah)
但現在你又開始妒火中燒
I copped my moms a big crib and went and got mine
我給了我和母親們一座避難所
An indoor pool with a house made and I'm not lyin' (Nope)
老實說那不過是一套帶室內游泳池的房子
A happy son who loves his dad , it's about time (Yeah)
是時候讓我的孩子愛著自己的父親
But I'm still starin' at the river tryna get across
此時我仍看著河流嘗試渡河
And all I see is apparitions of what never was
所看見的依舊只有從未所見的幻象
And everything I used to wish for is dead and lost
我曾希望的一切事物都已消逝
And if I never see your ass again, then I'll be better off
我想如果我從未遇見你我會過得更好
I think I'll be better off
過得更好
Karma comes back and it's co-co-comin' (Co-co-comin')
你永遠無法逃離這因果報應
Treatin' me bad and I'm ru -ru-runnin' (Ru-ru-runnin')
對我視耳不聞然而我早已溜之大吉
Karma comes back and it's co-co-comin' (Co-co-comin')
你永遠無法逃離這因果報應
Treatin' me bad, I'm ru-ru-runnin' (Ru-ru-runnin')
對我視耳不聞然而我早已溜之大吉
And congratulations, n*gga, you won
還有要祝賀你我承認你贏了
And all the love you never gave me, I can give to my son
那些你沒能給我的愛我都可以給我的孩子
Eternal love to my child, we'll forever be one
我對我孩子永恆的愛讓我和他如影隨形
Thanks to you, I know the man that I would never become
多虧了你讓我明白了我永遠不會成為像你這樣的男人
Never become
永遠不會