she cheated again

To be honest I didn't even want to make this
I knew the topic I would talk about was frowned upon
And heavily debated
Everybody thinks I'm happy but I'm not
And this here is my confession
How I let a girl destroy me
And then push me to the point of this depression
Ya I'm talking about that do or die
Ya I'm talking bout that suicide
Got all these cars man but who gon' ride?
****** my friend a couple times
Told me all those ******* lies
So I wrote a song so you could find out how I felt inside
I swear to God I almost shot myself a couple times
I should be dead
So I had a talk with God and he told me
I'd be hard so I asked if I could stay
And he could take you instead
Remember all the s**t that you was telling me?
How you loved me and want nobody above me
Now it's funny all the s**t
That you promised is just a memory
You gave me something to believe in
Then you broke me into pieces
And it's ***** ** with me mentally
And I can't trust no other *****
Because I'm starting to see woman as the enemy
I saw you texting with the dude and it was cool
Because you told me you and him were just friends
Then I caught you in the bed, let it slide,
Took you back, and then you went
And ****** the same dumb ***** again
What the **** *****? I gave my heart to you
There's a kid that no ones knows about and me
And you both know I am the father too
That means I am apart of you,
You went and broke my heart in two
Then stabbed me in the back
And watched me bleed and pulled an audible
****! How you think this gon' end?
Cause I been dealing with depression,
Social media attention
They expect me to be happy but I'm ******* depressed
I swear I'm ******* depressed
All the money in the world don't mean a thing
If you can't share it with somebody
That you love and that you ******* respect
Do you know how it feels to be awake
But all you want to do is go back to sleep?
Because reality is suffocating pushing on your chest
So all you want to do is go
And live your life in your dreams?
Do you know how it feels when the person
That you love doesn't love you back?
When they say the right things
But their actions are opposite of everything
They tell you everyday to relax?
***** I would've killed for you!
Man **** all of this music s**t
I'd pass up on a deal for you!
Other ****** tried to ****,
I swear I only saw the real in you!
You cheated twice and now I can't deal with you!
It's Dax
Dear God
I asked that you give me the strength, to trust again
Please help me relieve this burden from my heart
I know time heals all wounds
And some just take longer than others
So I'm going to trust you with this process
Amen
Everybody put your hands up if you can relate
We all been there, this is for you